My Mother

Name: Roberta Anne Simons Gilroy (Bobbi)

Birthplace: Lawndale, Ca. 1947

Mom was raised with her sister by her parents in various states throughout her childhood. She moved from California when she was seven to Chicago then back to California then to Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin and then back to California. Her father was an engineer and constantly looking for a better paying job despite his lack of education (nothing more than his High School diploma). She remembers him coming home from work with metal curls in the cuffs of his pants and says once he designed the tip of a paint sprayer so the paint would come out smooth and not globby. Her father was constantly encouraging her to get an education since his lack of it had such a big effect on his career and since her mother stopped going to school after the 8th grade because she only had one dress.

Her parents hated organized religion, while she craved it. Her father said there were hypocrites in churches and refused to go so she attended various denominations with friends and neighbors. She said, "The day in my teens that I went with a neighbor to an LDS Chapel was the day that turned my life around. I walked into the Chapel and knew I had found it, what I was looking for since I was 6 or so." One of her most spiritual experiences was walking into the 9th ward in Long Beach, Ca where she says she knew she was home.

Her father died when she was 17. She said, "I remember the day my father died. I knew he would die on a Sunday, so I had some peace other days of the weak. He had lymph sarcoma, had a cigar in his mouth from dawn to dusk all of his life. That Sunday morning early I was kneeling by my bed praying that he would be taken, he had been through so much suffering, and a wind went very fast by me. I minute later, 5 am or so, the phone rang and it was the hospital saying he had just passed away. My mother had quit visiting him for the last few days, she couldn't take it, but I had gone every day after school and had seen him the Saturday night before."

She wasn't very close to her father. He was strict, as was her mother, and used physical punishment a lot. She said she even had nightmares after she was married that he would come to her and tell her she couldn't be married anymore or have her two children. When she finally shared these dreams, her mother said she had been having similar ones, and then the dreams finally stopped.

She said she didn't have very many memorable school experiences other than a few teachers that inspired her, a report on Aztecs and Central America in grade school, pictures of her own hands that she drew once that her mother showed every person that ever came in their house for a decade "(that is only a few people!)" Before she was married she worked in the SC Institute of Religion in LA for some great men that made a lasting impression on her and grounded her in hard times.

At age 18 her mother moved back to Chicago with her sister which left her alone in California with the furniture and a rented house. She worked to pay the rent and got a roommate. She felt like she had no home base and no one to rely on for support but she had the church and was comforted by that. She was married at 21 and divorced at 44, having had six children.

After her divorce she went back to school and did not defend, but did a dissertation, and all comps and classes for a PsyD degree in OD.

She said her main goal in life "changes as life evolves. It was to raise great kids. Done. Now I think to evolve a good career. Also, to walk and talk with the Lord so closely I could feel like I could turn and look into His eyes."

When asked what makes her happy she shared this story, "Breanne asked me what fun was to me once when she was a teenager and we were driving somewhere, and I said I think fun, to me, was the work I do, and she rolled down the window and put out her head and screamed!!!!!!" In her spare time she loves to take care of her poodles, sew, do crafts, watch TV, garden, learn new things, calligraphy, look at new homes, and decorate her own.

She said one of the things that makes her sad is not being able to be close to her loved ones. She says it is hard to be in six places at once. But she also says it makes her sad when she is not understood by her loved ones, which is a lot of the time. The thing she most enjoys doing then, is going somewhere one on one where she can talk with the people she loves.

She has obviously overcome a lot of hardships which include the divorce and subsequently raising her children alone, back problems with a lot of pain, and feeling inferior to others (although her education helped her overcome that). But she has also been blessed through those trials. She shared a few experiences that exemplify this. One of those moments was when Breanne got married. She said, "I had struggled so much as a single parent, and in that beautiful Brides Room in the Timp Temple, light was coming in the stained glass windows, and all of a sudden in her wedding dress, sparkley and excited and fresh, she whirled unexpectedly and threw her arms around my neck and said "Thank you, Mom, for everything!" It just caught me and blew me away. It was impulsive, and I knew she had no clue what "everything" was, but the idea that she was grateful and had noticed I had been inputting into her life for a lot of years took my breath away!"

She was also called to work in the Mount Timpanogos temple last April. She says, "the first thing the President said was that I have been faithful and valiant my entire life, and the Lord knew it. I started crying, that leveled me for some reason, and then he said everything I have wanted my entire life would be bestowed upon me through my service in the temple. Whoa."