Ryan frequently reminds me of his paranoia with me and knives. It all started a few days after we were married. We were getting ready for bed and he said something smart like, "hope I don't find any knives under my pillow." Well, I don't remember if it was just after we went to bed or the next morning but there was indeed a knife under his pillow! I still remember the look of horror on his face. Now, before you start thinking I had any malicious intentions it was actually a perfectly explainable accident. We had done a lot of remodeling on this little duplex and the night before I was adjusting some blinds on the window above the bed. I couldn't find a screwdriver so I used a steak knife. I honestly don't remember it falling on the bed but I'm pretty sure that's how it ended up under his pillow. I thought it was funny at the time but since he frequently brings it up I don't think it was as funny to him.
We've been married 11 years now and I've never hurt my husband with a knife but he's still paranoid. So, this morning I'm unloading the dishwasher and he's making Eden oatmeal. He brings her bowl over to the sink and is about to pour the extra milk from Cameron's cereal into Eden's bowl. "Stop!" I screamed and waved my hands about. "Don't do that," I yelled again thinking he wasn't hearing me. He had this incredulous look on his face and was just staring at me. "It's gross," I felt the need to explain, still waving my hands about. Then I noticed what was in my hands - a butcher knife and a carving knife. Whoops. Sorry about that honey. I was really just about to put them away.
8 comments:
I laughed so hard I cried.
Now you're going to have to think back to every argument you've ever won and try to remember if there was a sharp implement in your hand at the time.
I think we're really missing the more important issue here, which is YOUR danger FROM knives. Specifically instances of flying sharp objects hitting your head!
I was never afraid. A little timid maybe. Not afraid.
Oh, that was so funny. I needed that.
Milk sharing is totally worthy of knife waving. Gross. That's so something Jason would do.
Great minds think alike. Just because one kid swooshed their spoon around in the cereal for a little bit (and maybe spilled some back in the bowl) doesn't mean it's TOO contaminated to pour into another bowl. Ok, maybe it does...but I'm trying to CONSERVE!
That is too funny!
Funny story! I laughed again. And then again when reading the comments! Really, how DID that knife end up under his pillow?
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